Nine Swords

Nexa's Jamaican rice and peas!

ingredients:

2 cups of white rice, long grain preferred
1 can of condensed cocunut milk, or 2 cups of it
1 cup of water
1 cup of chicken broth
1/2 cup of green onions, chopped
2 tablespoons of vegetable oil or butter
4 garlic cloves, chopped
1 can of kidney beans, rinsed and drained first
2 teaspoons of dried thyme
1 teaspoon of fresh grated ginger, or 1/2 teaspoon of the powdered stuff
A pinch of salt
1 large chile pepper (a scotch bonnet chile will do, pealed (for pepper newb, first grill this thing over a flame, the skin will peel right off. Don't touch your eyes while doing this though)

Begin by sautéing the green onions in a with the oil/butter pot until they brown/caramelize. Add the garlic, continue to sauté for another 30 seconds, then add the rice. Stir well and let sauté for another 2, stirring often. Add in the water, broth, coconut milk and stir in the salt and ginger. Pour in the drained kidney beans, toss in the thyme. Add the whole chile to the mix. Bring to a low boil, then reduce the heat to low and cover for 14-18minutes. When done, remove from heat and leave covered for 10 minutes. Then remove the chile, fluff the rice and then serve!

-1 cup'BROWN rice
-2cups o'water
-a pinch o'salt

Start by adding the water and salt to pot and bring that liquid solution to a freaking boil! Then add that BROWN rice to the pot, reduce heat to low and let concoction boil for a good 50 minutes. You can wash the BROWN rice first. It won't make it taste better or anything though. Afterwards, fluff, let cool for 3 minutes, then throw it away. This stuff tastes terrible unless you drown it in condiments or meat.

Nexa's HORCHATA (con alcohol)

1 cup of uncooked long grain rice
2 quarts warm water (...8 cups dude.)
1 tspn cinnamon
1 1/4 cups of milk (don't let your wife try and be healthy, use 2% or whole)
1 14 ounce can of sweetened condensed milk
1 tspn vanilla extract
1/4 cup spiced rum (Morgan or Kraken)
X shots of Kraken, where X= the number of times you must recheck this recipe.


Mix the rice and warm water together in a large bowl and let it stand for 30 minutes. Drain the water into a separate container and set aside, then place the rice in the bowl of a food processor. Add cinnamon and process that $#!7 until it forms a paste. Combine the rice with the water again water and let stand 2 hours, stirring occasionally as the water turns milky white. Strain the rice through a fine sieve into a bowl or pitcher. I'm going to assume you have no idea what a sieve is. Use a THIN, CLEAN, PREFERABLY NEW CLOTHE WITH NO STRINGY OR FUZZY BITS STICKING OUT in place of a sieve and you should probably wash it immediately or toss it out afterwards. Add to the strained contents, stirring, the milk, condensed milk, vanilla, and booze and chill concoction for 2 hours. Serve over ice.

Nexa's Herb Rice (actually one of my most bad@ss recipes...)

2 cups of chicken broth
1 cup of white rice
1/2 cup of chopped onions
1/2 cup of chopped mushrooms
1 tablespoon of chopped rosemary
1 teaspoon of marjorams mask
1/4 teaspoon of ocarina of thyme
1 tablespoon of butter
Add a pinch of salt if broth is sodium free

Add everything that is not the white rice into a pot and bring to a boil. Add the rice, stir, bring back to a boil. Reduce heat to low and cover for 14 minutes. Remove from heat, fluff rice and let stand uncovered for 2 minutes.

Nexa's Plain Normal Rice (recipe)

1 cup white rice
1 1/2 cups of water
a pinch of salt
1 teaspoon of butter (optional)

Bring water to a boil in a small pot with salt and butter. Add rice. Bring to a boil again before reducing heat to low and stirring, then leave covered for 14 minutes. Remove from heat and fluff with a fork, let cool uncovered for 2 minutes. Enjoy!

Corenna's Multicolored Rice Bake

Ingredients:
parboiled rice
water
salt to taste
egg shade food coloring
caramel food coloring

Instructions:
Place water and rice in baking pan, using proportions of 1 rice to 2 water. Cover with plastic and foil and bake at 350 degrees for about 45 minutes. Remove from oven and stir egg shade coloring into one end of pan, and caramel coloring into other end, leaving center plain. Cover and bake an additional 30 – 45 minutes, or until water is absorbed.


I expect you to make this troll colored

Bippy's Blini

Ingredients:

Flour 100 g.
Salt (a bit)
Sugar 1-2 tbsp
1-2 Eggs
Milk 300 ml
Vegetable Oil 1 tbsp

Instructions:
Put eggs, sugar, salt into a bowl, whisk together. Add the flour and stir the whole mess while pouring the milk. Stir it until smooth, add oil and stir a bit more. Remember, the batter must be thin.
Heat up a frying pan as hot as possible Apply thin (!) layer of oil (yeah, like that).
Pour a THIN layer of batter over the frying pan and let it spread all around the surface evenly. When the edges become a bit dry, flip it to the other side. Take it off the pan in a matter of seconds (10-15), as it cooks very quickly.
Stack them on a plate on top of each other. Delicious!

Traditionally served with sour cream, butter, or honey. A nice jam or syrup will also do, as will cheese, bacon (!), or anything you might come up with

Ravy's Onigiri

Short rice such as sushi or calrose cooked to perfection in a rice cooker (wait until it plays the heavenly music indicating that your rice is cooked to perfection)

a can of tuna drained. Add mayo to the tuna and mix

a bowl filled with water and a TBSP of salt.(stir until dissolved)

Now the fun part:

dip your hands in the salt water
take 1/4 cup of rice and mush in one cupped palm
take thumb of the other hand and make an imprint in the center of your mound
take a spoonful of tuna mixture and put in the imprint
take another 1/4 cup of rice and put on top
Now gently mold into a sphere or triangle
cut a piece of nori and place on your onigiri to hold it without making a mess

eat it up yum!

Maxwell's The 4am

Stagger around in your place and try to get a hold of every bit of alcohol beverages that have not yet been consumed.
Reel to the kitchen and get the biggest vessel available.
Pause for a shot to brace yourself for the task at hand.
Pour all the alcohol in front of you into the vessel (add straws for more convenient drinking).

You know you have succeeded when the beverage gets a nasty colour ... and later all consuments will try to get into your bathroom all at once.

Tip: Coloured wodka adds an especially terrible colour to this cocktail.

Katelin's Peppermint Creams

Ingredients
250g icing sugar
30ml double cream or condensed milk
½ an egg white
peppermint essence
green food colouring (optional but definitely a good idea)
200g dark chocolate , melted

Method
1.Mix all the ingredients, except the chocolate, to a stiff paste, adding the essence and colour in drips until you have a flavour and colour you like. Roll the paste until it is about 5mm thick and use a star shaped cutter (or a shape of your preference) then dry your sweets on a sheet of baking parchment.

2. Dip half of each sweet into the chocolate and leave to set on the paper.

3. Eat - but not too many at once because they are sickly sweet and will give you tummy ache.